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Sat. Oct 19th, 2019

Read 4 Fun

Read the short reviews, read the book, comment

Very Simulating Reading

3 min read

Image by Michael-T on Pixabay

Filling a long-standing blank space in literature, Book Simulator by Chris Yee has finally landed. At long last Faux readers will be able to follow a well-crafted training plan that will allow them to fake out their more erudite well-read brethren. BookSi gives the impression that Faux readers are reading when in fact they are visualizing cashews on trolleys (Kindle location 118). This book has already made an impact at the highest levels of government. It is a coffee table book in most apartments at Swamp Towers.

This book can be valuable for all age and occupational groups from Parents to The Illiterate and many groups in between (to include robots in disguise). (Kindle location 15). While simulated reading can take place any time of the day, this manual has sections recommending optimal times. This is a superior social interaction avoidance device (SIAD) to the handphone. And it looks more intelligent.

Don’t be confused by occasional blank pages. They are provided so the readers can visualize freely. Exercises provide prompts that should stimulate reader abilities to fill the blank pages with hordes of imaginary creatures and situations. If you are some sort of a sick perv, everything is still SFW because all the crude stuff is only in your mind. Nothing appears on the non-existent page.

The enemy of all Faux readers are People Watchers (actual readers). These are to be avoided because ReadrSims end up in needless physical competition with Actual Readers and ReaderSims must flee. People Watchers may be training for the Olympics and ReaderSims won’t have a chance to outrun them. People watchers are dangerous literates jealous of the amount of money ReaderSims are saving by Simulation Reading. Follow the instructions in this book and never get caught. Practice eye contact, eye movement, page-turning itself as well as the timing of page turning. All of this can be done without reading one word. The best part is, it works in all languages.

Starting at 35% point of this book, the reader will proceed to advanced simulation. Readers may choose to be ranked as to competence by submitting validation credentials to the author of this book. The author may not accept the credentials or even acknowledge their submission in any way. Think of it like submitting a complaint to Facebook.

At some point in this book, two named characters will emerge. There is BookSi (Book Simulation Intelligence) and the Narrator. The narrator believes that books should have stories, characters, conflicts, and context. The Narrator is omniscient. BookSi, the presenter of this book from the beginning and the overall instructor up to the appearance of the Narrator, believes in no structure. One of them will disappear (die) at the end of this work.

This 132-page novel is fun. I found it in Amazon at the great price of USD0.00. This was a purchase price, not a KU read. It is clever, funny, and witty for any reader up to the point of the introduction of the Narrator. From that point, there is additionally a lot of subtle humor for authors and would-be authors. This gets five Amazon stars for creativity. Watch out for BookSi which will claim that there are many typos to be found throughout the work and will challenge the reader to find them.

BookSi lies.

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